Addict

 I am an addict

But 

Aren’t we all

From the drinks 

to the attention

We’re all bound to fall

Life is what life brings

With flowers so sweet

And days so searing

We’ll do all we can

To achieve chemicals 

So the heart sings

I struggle with drink

And chewy plant

I once thought,

‘I’ll sub drink with herb,’

But found myself 

In a ménage a trois

So seductive

So alluring

I can stop

Said every addict

Until it was too late

But knowledge glows

Only from the throes

Of pain and life aligned

So

Here we are

Just another day

In my life

When I think

There’s gotta be another way

I’ll quit 

The downers and uppers

The alcohol and the caffeine

Everything that brings joy

And everything in between 

To build a stronger life

One with wisdom

Acquired from strife

To be a better model 

For J and P.

Tomorrow begins day one.

No caffeine, no booze, no herb

Wish me luck

Those Who Were There

 Personally

I believe in ghosts.

I feel that

Everybody on this planet

We’re all surrounded by ghosts.

Those who are there

To protect us

Those who were there

To warn us

Or those who where there 

to possibly  attack us.

And all these ghosts

Have been driven

By their own decisions

While they were 

In their past lives.

But in their death

They wanna see

The mission accomplished 

So to speak

They want to see 

the end goals

Of their actions

While they were living

So they pursue

 a lifetime through

The sons and daughters

In our society.

Saturday Night

 There’s a hole 

In my chest

The size of a cavern

A chasm 

growing wider

And I suspect

There’s a pattern

Of plying vice upon ice

And hoping for an end

To the misery that lies within

It consumes

Like most do

When alone

Amongst ones demons

A battle surges 

To reclaim my soul

Or at the very least

The woeful return 

of my weathered happiness 

“Put another one away”

Tempting fate

But alas

I wake up

Each morning 

Wondering

When will it be my last?

I’ve seen my Death

And this way ain’t it

But until then 

I’ll keep stomaching it

Truth

Your mind wants it

But your ears and heart don’t 

For friends will stand by you 

Sometimes, they just won’t

Not only parts your lips

But also shuts them so tight

Puts babes to rest

But keeps you up all night

It changes form

The wasp of life

It can wound so deep

But also set you free

Choose its paths wisely 

 And take care of its destiny

Guard it tight

And don’t regret

Always forgive

But never forget.

Hero?

 Am I a hero?

I have flaws 

I won’t deny

That at times

I’m the best

At making myself cry.

Am I a hero?

I will admit

Although I suffer

I show up

When every

body else quits.

I’m no hero

I understand 

But I always

Do the best that I can.

I’ve spilled beads of sweat,

Drops of tears,

Enough of my blood

To fill most hearts with fear.

Maybe not, 

Now that I 

think of it,

Is their glory 

for a fool 

who can’t quit?

Am I wasting my talents

By not chasing the fame

Or am I doing 

what needs to be done 

as I walk alone

The only one

To choose the path 

Of the whistlin’ mailman?

Nah, I’m no hero.

Just doing my job

Just another day

Gotta keep moving

Cuz the job’s not done.

Time

 I feel like 

Such a bumbling

Fumbling fool

Who jumbles and juggles

Phrords and waises 

No

Words and phrases

When tired am I

And  annoyed me be

So frustrated at times

To explain this feird weeling

No

Weird feeling

So tired all the time

Can’t abide by 

chimes of pressure

It’s beyond defeating 

Silence works best for me

To formulate ideas more eloquently 

No wonder nobody listens to the unintended hypocrisy 

Why Bother

Ask a question 

No response 

Offer a solution

No action

Wayward winds blowing in wanton ways

Stay in for the long haul with no looks and no praise

Ask a question

No response

Offer a solution 

No action

Stifled silence slowly snuffs out the internal flame

What remains are the smoky ashes of insolent blame

Ask a question

No response 

Offer a solution

No action